I bet you are fucking awful ;) ;) - 23 (Chicago)

Really, I bet you're terrible. You have dependency issues, you like bad music, you aren't very funny. You probably have an annoying laugh. I bet you do.

WELL HEY, MOVE ON LOLOLOLOL this ad is only for SILLY GEESE

If you think eight equals equals equals equals a capitol D is hysterical and love making racial humor in the south side ( really, the upside ;) ) then HOLD ON TO YOUR KEYBOARDS! I'm the guy for you.

Look I dont want your A S L, I just want to know if you're ready for a guy who wants to hit it, quit it, admit it, and then remit on it.

s2r (kisses and hugz lol)

Here is a pic for you lovely ladies, PLEASE THERE IS ONLY ONE OF ME TO GO AROUND (lol but I'll take two ;) )

(no really I'm a one woman man)

((but I'll take another man ;) )

(wait that's bad news for my anus)

:(

(((I really love music and if you have a ZiP drive we can swap tunez)))

ATTACHED IS A PIC of Collin Firth some say I look like him but then again some say the holocaust happened and we cant really believe them ;)

cowboyhardware3 - 24 (parma/albion)

howdy there i just got out of a relationship where i wasn't appreciated for what i did and what not, but i'm a big time country boy but my life is a cowboy. i own horses and i am looking for a country girl to have fun with i like to party and just hang out with friends at the bar in parma. i love to hunt and fish as well as ride my crotch rocket when i can so if ya interested send me a message


When I read 'ride my crotch rocket,' I might have loled a little bit...I'm pretty sure that puts me on par intellectually with 12-year-old boys.
Also of note: how does one ride one's own crotch rocket?

Just an old Hippie lookin 4 my Flower - 53 (Prairieville)

Read before you email. Just an old hippie looking for a laid back, down to earth woman That's it. Plain and simple. DO NOT REPLY IF YOU WANT ME TO SEE YOUR PICs ON A WEBSITE!!I will not reply so you are just wasting time. Must know what you want!!! All women are welcome. Have a photo if interested. Looking for someone that's 4ft to 6ft, 35 to 60 years old, petite, slim, average, a pound or to won't bother me either, for a long term commitment, friends 1st, who doesn't mind getting her hands dirty in the garden or baiting her own hook, cuddle ling together on the couch or going out to dinner & a movie. Must be open & honest. No druggies, pill heads, drunks need apply, please. Live in my own house with 1 small dog,two goldfish and a pet crawfish. Disabled, I walk with a limp. After a long day, I usually wind up in a recliner watching a little TV or reading.

Pet crawfish as a selling point? Hell to the yes! I think I just lost a little piece of my heart to this hippie from Louisiana.

WANTED: Shallow, Arrogant, Gold digger - 23 (Kalamazoo)

If you fit these qualities I would love to chat. If you dont fit these qualities I would love to chat as well. Just trying the whole online dating thing. Im smart, good looking, and have an athletic body type. I can also fight off a black bear* in the forest if need be. If you would like to know more, send me an email and a photo(and please NO nudity-keep it classy ladies), we can chat, and possibly meet up if things go right.

ciao *previously I had something about being a "dragon slayer". I was referencing the fairy tale aspect, and was completely unaware of the slang meaning at the time.

Do you like musicians??? - 37 (Lapeer)

Hello,, Hello,, Well do you like live music and like to have fun?? Then this add is for you,, cause i'm Mr. Fun. I have a great sense of humor, love kids, single for sure and all around good guy. I don't live with my mom,, i live with my Dad.. Just kidding. I'm playing at Fatboys in Lapeer Oct. 31st and Nov. !st. Holloween weekend,, so come see me ( naughty costumes encouraged ). I'll be dressed as a clown or Batman,,, I can't decide.

Craig AKA MR. Fun

Hershey Brown looking for White Delight

Hi my name is Moose! Im 22 and I am a senior at The University of Baltimore. I am Pre-Law! and have a PHD( pretty huge dick) I like to go out in Towson, Fed Hill, Downtown. I'm looking for nothing serious right now. But if the right girl comes around i'm willing to take it long term. If you are interested in meeting up or hooking up please send a picture with your email! No crazies and no guys!! No virgins unless you are really really hot, and amazing with your mouth!


PhD? PHD? Roflmao.

Cut out that rotten spot and eat the rest - 55 (Utica slums)

Looking for a wonderful gal that enjoys short walks out to the clothes line to take in clothes (that are still wet) just before a thunder storm

That enjoys long rides in our 1980 Dodge Aspen with flapping in the breeze rusted front fenders

That loves to make love under the stars because we just got evicted from our house because of nonpayment of our mortagage

And loves being naked in public because all of our clothes are in the house we can no longer access with the locks now having been changed

If all of this sounds like fun, contact me ASAP

I offer myself, no financial security, and a nasty extra sharp cheese addiction

Other inducements , being what they are, are listed below.

The inducements are pictures of this man holding hot mustard packets, quarters, and a banana.

Uuuuuhhhhuuhhuhh.... Hey, baby.... - 22 (Idaho Falls)

Okay, if you clicked then you PROBABLY realize that the title was a joke. Okay, let's face it, I'm drunk, horny, and bored out of my frickin' mind and looking for somebody to talk to. Can't drive, legally blind, other than that brown hair, blue eyes, five-nine, regular guy. Good looking, at least, that's what I've been told, so email me if you want to kick-it (or whatever...). Late.