Blood, tonails, hair, and all else still lacking (Mid-City)

I had written a proper response for your kind message. And I have one more thing for you

I wanted to tell you the intelligence
attains the grand summation of
molecular motion at absolute zero.

You're lone response cannot compare with the apex of a ferris wheel nor that of the spammers on their tired tirade, nor the nadir of a ditch filled with a coelocanth's droppings.

I hope that I remind you of the shrouded enigma of an important postage never sent.
Your response in any form again would bring me a dashingly colored toupee that would twist around my right shoe into a state of ennui with the speed and dexterity of many lemon meringue-coated conquistadors.

I hope to hear back from you.
xo



What the fuck? It sounds like someone replaced a bunch of words using a thesaurus after sprinkling World of Warcraft references into a high school science textbook.

HOT.

After I CUM I am not DONE! - 34 (Downtown Fresno)

I am a romantic young gentleman and poetry is to me a skill
By just seeing you in person I can make wet with thrill
I do not need a pen or paper to express to you what I see
Just the words from my mouth will make you want to feel the sight of me
I also never stop from evening until later past the morning dawn
I will Cum a few times but I will not say thank you and be gone
I will Give you oral sex with my rather think tongue
and then I will be hard again and inside you again I'll be sprung
I love the position of you riding me and you'll be surprised at what I can do
while your riding my think penis I can lift my pelvis inside of you
I will feel like a pole you are riding and for hours you can ride
and I know this is NSA but if you want more of me I can be open to be TIED

I do not have a credit card or a checking account so I can not join a site that needs that for age check, But I will give you any information so you can see I am a very legal decent guy that is 34 I work downtown Fresno and live in downtown also. I hope I will hear from a woman because I am so bored and sad now.

I spent 20 minutes trying to write a response poem to the poster telling him where he went wrong, but every time I tried I ended up with this:

STOP.

It's been said before but: bad poetry? Oh noetry! People, stop before your god-awful "poetry" hurts someone you would like to love in the future, NSA, TIED, or otherwise.

Fairly unrelated: how does a 34-year-old man live, work, and survive without any type of bank account? I'm not sure whether or not that's a feat, and thus something I should be impressed with by default.

DAN *DO NOT FLAG* VERY IMPORTANT HE READS THIS! - 20 (Belmont)

Hey Dan maybe you should check your email. I think I got your girlfriend pretty dang upset right now, I told her how Jessica is over there right now and how you have been cheating on her. Man what a shame. I'm sure your ingoring her phone calls just like you are doing to mine *CHEATER* Man I hope she isn't going to break up with you. What a shame.

I have nothing but questions about this ad. Who is Dan, and why does he only read m4w ads, and not w4m?* Who posted this, and what did Dan do to them? Why is Dan ignoring his/her calls? Is Dan ignoring his/her emails, too? Is Dan's girlfriend going to break up with him? Who's Jessica? How does the poster know Dan is cheating on his girlfriend with Jessica? Why does the poster think that this ad will get Dan's attention even though he/she's already emailed, called, and likely left messages? Do they really think Dan doesn't know? So many questions for such a short ad! MAN, WHAT A SHAME.

*I checked, and this was only posted in m4w, not w4m, w4w, or m4m.

Sanguinarian (Grand Rapids)

Do you know what that is?

I'm normal. I have a normal life, a normal career, I look pretty normal too.

I just have a little taste that I haven't been able to indulge in years. indulgence

Discretion is the key. And safety of course. If you are willing to give of yourself, then I would be most appreciative. I have nothing much to offer, other than perhaps a nice dinner before or afterwards. I am not looking for or offering anything even remotely sexual here. I am not a sadist or a masochist either.

I expect no responses, but a man can dream. This is not a joke. I'm hungry.