Showing posts with label the poster is probably very pale. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the poster is probably very pale. Show all posts
08 March 2009
Searching for my princess Leia - 25 (Downers Grove)
Greetings I've decided to give this a shot. Trying to meet women at the bar is lame and outdated. I want to meet a woman who is truly interested in who I am and having a meaningful relationship. Okay, here are somethings about me...I have a very high appreciation for music. I'm kind of a self-proclaimed geek. I enjoy comic books, video games, and I also moonlight as a master jedi. I am a nice hybrid of homebody meets adventurer. It's always a party hanging out playing boardgames or spending quality time watching the Wars or some episodes of TNG with that special someone, but I also enjoy getting out and seeking excitement. I consider myself an avid outdoorsman who likes to fish, hike, camp, travel, and hunt for moral mushrooms. One of my daily rituals is to go out for a nice long run. A favorite pastime of mine is to play music with my friends. I play the drums, and I am also attempting to play the piano/casio. She's a '84. We'll see where that takes me. Okay, enough about me...
I'm looking for someone who is equally active and appreciative of a good time. I am truly looking for someone for the long haul. I'm not interested in one night stands, and "No" you may not use my photos for any modeling and/or scandelous activities.
You're al gae and I'm a fun gi and together we are a linchen. hehe.
If you're interested, please send me some kind of correspondence and a photo would be nice.
Thanks!
Love of Star Wars? CHECK. Bad science-related puns? CHECK. Misspelling of scandalous? CHECK, again! Learning how to play a Casio?
Husband?
26 December 2008
Jar Jar Binks looking for his Queen Amadala - 22 (Naboo)
Hiya! Me'sa called Jar Jar Binks. Me's am looking for a wonderful girl to call my own. She's a make me laugh, and she'sa have fun with me, and preferably she'sa be a nerd like me! Me'sa likes to watch movies and cuddle, go to the park and swing on the swings and then jump off to see how far I can jump off, and me's liking the Star Wars. Does you'sa smoke? Cause me'sa not for liking the smoking. It's bad. Me'sa has 3 tattoos and me'sa definitely wants more. Me'sa can sing really good too. Specially in the shower and the car. Sorry to cut this short, but me'sa really needs to go to bed. Me's am tired and me'sa gots to wake up early in the morning. So if you's is liking what me'sa has had to say, you should definitely e-mail me.
12 October 2008
***Girlfriend potential test*** - 33 (Minot)
Instructions: Please answer the questions below as directed in each section. You will be marked for grammar, spelling, cleverness, creativity and boob-size. Please keep in mind that while this is not an application for a job, your performance on this test will be a reflection of your ability to achieve certain positions once out in the real world. When the clock strikes the hour, you may begin. You have sixty minutes to complete the test.
Section One: Multiple Choice (Answer All, 5 points)
When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.
Q1. Six months into our relationship, I go away to a tropical location with my family for a week over Christmas. This vacation was planned as a family event two years prior to meeting you. This is:
a) A great opportunity to get some things done without me around.
b) A great opportunity to attempt to sleep with my college roommate and/or my boss.
c) A sign that you are probably just a casual thing that I could toss aside at any given moment despite the fact I bought you probably the most thoughtful gift you've ever received and written you a letter for every day that I'll be gone, inciting you to 'Go on the Defensive.'
d) Occasion to have a sexy dinner at home the night before I leave, and a mini 'welcome home' party when I get back that’s guest list is just you, me, a bottle of wine and a pack of condoms.
Q2. We've talked every night for eight days (not including the dinner/opera show I took you to on Saturday night that was followed by possibly your worst performance in bed ever, or the Monday night that I came over and we spent the evening making Rachel Ray recipes and watching Heroes followed by the best oral sex I've ever given you), with conversation time averaging about an hour per night. On a Thursday night, when on a deadline, I express a need to get off the phone so I can finish some work and go to bed at a reasonable hour. You:
a) Express your feelings of devotion in three words or less, then and quickly say goodbye after confirming plans for tomorrow night are still on.
b) Say goodbye, but then immediately begin talking about something that we hadn't discussed as thoroughly as is scientifically, legally or religiously possible two nights prior.
c) Take that as a sign that I'm abandoning you, and begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry.
d) Say goodbye, but manage to do it with such menace and venom that I stay on the phone for another three silence filled hours, broken only by fits of gentle weeping and suicide threats.
Q3. I'm throwing change at your cleavage, which is readily on display in that loose fitting tank top you wear around my place on Sundays after brunch. Do you:
a) Wing the largest of the coins at my head, with an evil glare and then refuse to speak to me for the rest of the day.
b) Encourage my behavior, and allow me to purchase Afternoon Delights from you at discount prices.
c) Cry.
d) Cry and pick a fight with me, taking my actions as a total lack of respect for you and then begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry some more.
Q4. We're having a fight. You:
a) Throw me out of your apartment, then thirty minutes later send 17 texts and attempt to call 13 times in the space of six minutes.
b) Give me space when the discussion gets too heated for rational thought, and redress your complaints in a calm manner when we've both had a chance to cool down.
c) Flip me the bird.
d) Wail on my junk.
e) both c and d
f) realize that the fight is about nothing, and begin creating fictional problems and make wild accusations about my obsession with material goods and having a wandering eye.
g) f, then d, then c.
Q5. I play [video games OR tabletop gaming OR fantasy football]. You:
a) Want to join in, because it looks like hella fun.
b) Leave me to it, in the hopes that I'll leave you a few things to participate in on your own.
c) Attempt to get me to quit, and use tactics like nagging, vandalism and emotional sabotage as an effective campaign against what you call my 'nerdy addiction.'
d) c, but also include deriding me to your friends.
Section Two: True or False (Answer All, 10 points)
When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.
Q1. Rationale and Reason are the same thing.
Q2. A cheerleader AND/OR schoolgirl outfit is a wardrobe must.
Q3. Talking in your 'cute voice' just before you put my balls in my mouth is sexy.
Q4. Learning body language and communication cues is important.
Q5. 'Anchorman' and 'Superbad' are hilarious movies.
Q6. "But it's cute when I do it" should be a legally viable defense.
Q7. Chest hair is gross.
Q8. Bono is probably the most important political figure of our generation.
Q9. Sex is an important part of a relationship, and should be had frequently, often, whenever possible - within moderation, of course.
Q10. A relationship is metaphorically a two way street. So is your butt.
Section Three: Short Essay. (Answer ONE, 5 points)
Please select one of the following questions and answer it as fully as time will allow. Please try and be as descriptive as possible, and where applicable, come up with at least TWO convincing arguments to support your case. Arguments must be backed up with cited evidence, not anecdotal perspective.
Q1. If I was a crime-fighting vigilante by night, what efforts would you make to support my cause about the rising threat of evil in this city?
Q2. Please come up with a convincing game-plan for having me come shopping with you, keeping in mind my retail oriented attention span is about twelve minutes, and I am prone to wandering after flashing lights and shiny things.
Q3. Please argue why you are (do) or are not (do not): 'Down to Earth', 'Have a sense of humor' and 'Laid back'. Bonus if you can include evidence to confirm that you truly do avoid 'head games.'
Please submit answers via the email link provided. Please also keep a copy of this test and your answers to submit to future suitors for reference. Remember to ensure your name, number and bra size are clearly written at the top of your paper, and don't forget to attach a photo (3/4 length or full).
Section One: Multiple Choice (Answer All, 5 points)
When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.
Q1. Six months into our relationship, I go away to a tropical location with my family for a week over Christmas. This vacation was planned as a family event two years prior to meeting you. This is:
a) A great opportunity to get some things done without me around.
b) A great opportunity to attempt to sleep with my college roommate and/or my boss.
c) A sign that you are probably just a casual thing that I could toss aside at any given moment despite the fact I bought you probably the most thoughtful gift you've ever received and written you a letter for every day that I'll be gone, inciting you to 'Go on the Defensive.'
d) Occasion to have a sexy dinner at home the night before I leave, and a mini 'welcome home' party when I get back that’s guest list is just you, me, a bottle of wine and a pack of condoms.
Q2. We've talked every night for eight days (not including the dinner/opera show I took you to on Saturday night that was followed by possibly your worst performance in bed ever, or the Monday night that I came over and we spent the evening making Rachel Ray recipes and watching Heroes followed by the best oral sex I've ever given you), with conversation time averaging about an hour per night. On a Thursday night, when on a deadline, I express a need to get off the phone so I can finish some work and go to bed at a reasonable hour. You:
a) Express your feelings of devotion in three words or less, then and quickly say goodbye after confirming plans for tomorrow night are still on.
b) Say goodbye, but then immediately begin talking about something that we hadn't discussed as thoroughly as is scientifically, legally or religiously possible two nights prior.
c) Take that as a sign that I'm abandoning you, and begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry.
d) Say goodbye, but manage to do it with such menace and venom that I stay on the phone for another three silence filled hours, broken only by fits of gentle weeping and suicide threats.
Q3. I'm throwing change at your cleavage, which is readily on display in that loose fitting tank top you wear around my place on Sundays after brunch. Do you:
a) Wing the largest of the coins at my head, with an evil glare and then refuse to speak to me for the rest of the day.
b) Encourage my behavior, and allow me to purchase Afternoon Delights from you at discount prices.
c) Cry.
d) Cry and pick a fight with me, taking my actions as a total lack of respect for you and then begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry some more.
Q4. We're having a fight. You:
a) Throw me out of your apartment, then thirty minutes later send 17 texts and attempt to call 13 times in the space of six minutes.
b) Give me space when the discussion gets too heated for rational thought, and redress your complaints in a calm manner when we've both had a chance to cool down.
c) Flip me the bird.
d) Wail on my junk.
e) both c and d
f) realize that the fight is about nothing, and begin creating fictional problems and make wild accusations about my obsession with material goods and having a wandering eye.
g) f, then d, then c.
Q5. I play [video games OR tabletop gaming OR fantasy football]. You:
a) Want to join in, because it looks like hella fun.
b) Leave me to it, in the hopes that I'll leave you a few things to participate in on your own.
c) Attempt to get me to quit, and use tactics like nagging, vandalism and emotional sabotage as an effective campaign against what you call my 'nerdy addiction.'
d) c, but also include deriding me to your friends.
Section Two: True or False (Answer All, 10 points)
When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.
Q1. Rationale and Reason are the same thing.
Q2. A cheerleader AND/OR schoolgirl outfit is a wardrobe must.
Q3. Talking in your 'cute voice' just before you put my balls in my mouth is sexy.
Q4. Learning body language and communication cues is important.
Q5. 'Anchorman' and 'Superbad' are hilarious movies.
Q6. "But it's cute when I do it" should be a legally viable defense.
Q7. Chest hair is gross.
Q8. Bono is probably the most important political figure of our generation.
Q9. Sex is an important part of a relationship, and should be had frequently, often, whenever possible - within moderation, of course.
Q10. A relationship is metaphorically a two way street. So is your butt.
Section Three: Short Essay. (Answer ONE, 5 points)
Please select one of the following questions and answer it as fully as time will allow. Please try and be as descriptive as possible, and where applicable, come up with at least TWO convincing arguments to support your case. Arguments must be backed up with cited evidence, not anecdotal perspective.
Q1. If I was a crime-fighting vigilante by night, what efforts would you make to support my cause about the rising threat of evil in this city?
Q2. Please come up with a convincing game-plan for having me come shopping with you, keeping in mind my retail oriented attention span is about twelve minutes, and I am prone to wandering after flashing lights and shiny things.
Q3. Please argue why you are (do) or are not (do not): 'Down to Earth', 'Have a sense of humor' and 'Laid back'. Bonus if you can include evidence to confirm that you truly do avoid 'head games.'
Please submit answers via the email link provided. Please also keep a copy of this test and your answers to submit to future suitors for reference. Remember to ensure your name, number and bra size are clearly written at the top of your paper, and don't forget to attach a photo (3/4 length or full).
08 October 2008
SWM Rennfest Veteran Seeks Maiden - 40 (DE & MD)
Greetings,
I am a long time veteran of MDRF. I enjoy everything about Renaissance Festivals. So far, my only experience has been MDRF, but I do hope to travel to PARF sometime, and possibly other ones. Besides being a Rennie, my other interests include cooking, exploring the Chesapeake, travel, biking, tennis. Some of my favorite places are Winterthur Museum and Gardens, Longwood Gardens, The Brandywine Valley, Europe. Rather than post some boring photo here, I will give one of my Myspace sites
www.myspace.com/scruffy_rennfest
I also love vacationing in the Rehoboth - Ocean City region. I do have other sites which I post photos, but lets first see if you can accept a Rennie... Though I am divorced and have run the gamot of girlfriends, dates, etc, I seem to have turned into the invisible man. All of my other efforts to meet a decent woman have failed, so what the hell..... here goes.......
I am a long time veteran of MDRF. I enjoy everything about Renaissance Festivals. So far, my only experience has been MDRF, but I do hope to travel to PARF sometime, and possibly other ones. Besides being a Rennie, my other interests include cooking, exploring the Chesapeake, travel, biking, tennis. Some of my favorite places are Winterthur Museum and Gardens, Longwood Gardens, The Brandywine Valley, Europe. Rather than post some boring photo here, I will give one of my Myspace sites
www.myspace.com/scruffy_rennfest
I also love vacationing in the Rehoboth - Ocean City region. I do have other sites which I post photos, but lets first see if you can accept a Rennie... Though I am divorced and have run the gamot of girlfriends, dates, etc, I seem to have turned into the invisible man. All of my other efforts to meet a decent woman have failed, so what the hell..... here goes.......
05 September 2008
Sex idiot seeks understanding woman - 23 (Fort Campbell)
I never got out much while I was young, so I play a lot of computer games and watch anime. I'm looking for a girl that will understand and accept the guy that I am. I love to eat out, go to the movies, and most of the time, just sit at home and relax. I'm in the army and currently deployed. I don't like talking about my job much, so I ask for secrecy in that department. I would like a thinner woman that is compassionate and caring. I look forward to hearing from everyone. I'm not all that good looking, so please don't freak out when you see the picture of me.
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